A Collection of Politically Correct Jokes !

Politically Correct Jokes

The prime Minister of China called President Bush to console him after the
attack on the Pentagon:

"I'm sorry to hear about the attack.It is a very big tragedy. But in case
you are missing any documents from the Pentagon, we have copies of
everything."

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Musharraf calls Bush on 11th sept:

Musharraf: Mr President, I would like to express my condolences to you. It
is a real tragedy. So many people, such great bldgs... I would like to
ensure that we had nothing in connection with that..

Bush: What buildings? What people??

Musharraf: Oh, and what time is it in America now?

Bush: It's eight in the morning.

Musharraf: Oops...Will call back in an hour!

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Vajpayee and Bush are sitting in a bar. A guy walks in and asks the barman,
"Isn't that Bush and Vajpayee?"

The barman says "Yep, that's them." So the guy walks over and says, "Hello,
what are you guys doing?"

Bush says, " We're planning world war-3 "

The guy says, "Really? What's going to happen?"

And Vajpayee says, "Well, we're going to kill 14 million Pakistanis and one
bicycle repairman."

And the guy exclaimed, "A bicycle repairman ?!! !"

Vajpayee turns to Bush and says, "See, I told you no-one would worry about
the 14 million Pakistanis!"

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Pakistani on the moon:

Q: What do you call 1 Pakistani on the moon?
A: Problem...

Q: What do you call 10 Pakistanis on the moon?
A: Problem...

Q: What do you call a 100 Pakistanis on the moon?
A: Problem...

Q: What do you call ALL the Pakistanis on the moon?
A: ...... Problem Solved!!!

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A man is taking a walk in Central park in New York . Suddenly he sees a
little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog. He runs over and starts
fighting with the dog. He succeeds in killing the dog and saving the girl's
life.

A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says: "You are a hero,
tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers:

"Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl".

The man says: "But I am not a New Yorker!"

Oh then it will say in newspapers in the morning:

"Brave American saves life of little girl" the policeman answers.

"But I am not an American!" - says the man. Oh, what are you then?"

The man says: "I am a Pakistani!"

The next day the newspapers say: "Extremist kills innocent American dog"

..........................

Parvati kare Tandav !

My friend and artist of high order at Amravati, Sanjay Ganorakar is a Gandhi fan. Every year on 1st and 2nd Oct , Gandhi Jayanti, the couple visits Sewagram Ashram. Today, I called them to greet after they returned home. Wanting to speak to Sanjeevani, I jokingly asked Sanjay, where's Kasturba? Saying Ba is just besides him, he handed over the phone to her. She quipped, "How are you , Mahadeo bhai ? " (Mahadeo bhai Desai, Gandhiji's best friend) I instantly replied " Fearing to go home . Parvati (Anita, my wife) must be doing Tandav by now for I being late ! "

Bless us with the Darkness

Risod, a small town in vidarbha saw a strangest of ever agitation. It was a non political Morcha by hundreds of women storming and blocking the Muncipalty. The demand was : Remove the street lights immidiatly or build public latrins . Jyotirma Tamasam Gamay ! No Sandas so Roadam Gamay !!

Insaf Karo !

Anuj > AT. 9hr 9min 9secs on 9th Sept. this year the time date will be
09.09.09.09.09.09. AMAZING Me > Not celebrating family union of the 9's will be bahut 9 safi !

We = The Softest Chinese "Dish"

Micky's SMS > Life has so much 2teach us? Once a famous Chinese poet said : "Singliyo chuva chongloma ciyona sung chung chang ching una sevol ujnar"??Really heart touching na ? My Instant Reply : Irshad ! Thats the famous Chinese Gazal written by Ba.ing Ci.hung Mardhingu. sung by chinese singer Jingjeet sheng. Meaning = Hame pasand bahut bewakuf hamara padosi India .hai jaise ki wo Chikan boneless wala !

Sahi Ladaka !

Ladkiwale- Hame aisa Ladka chahiye jo kuchh khata-pita na ho, aur kuchh Galat kam na karta ho.. Pandit- Ji han ! Bilkul aisahi Ladka apko ICU me vantilator pe jarur milega.

21st Century Rabbit n Tortoise

Yesterday I met a Rabbit in a Mall.

I asked whats he doing there ?

He said, marathon to climb the hill is round the week end and he is looking for a hammock, cold drinks and eye pads.

I almost screamed, you seem to learn no lesson from the last race, look at the Tortoise, he just paid for goggles, helmet and a pair of skates ! N U just planned for relaxing , huh ?

Smiling behind the antennas of the mustaches, pointing eye gaze to a mobile like device in the shirt pocket, he whispered, look just dont let HIM know, first of all, I have got this latest GPS gizmo with built in Alarm Clock with a vibrator !!

Then The day of race came.

The Rabbit reached the Hill Top, huffing and puffing with the GPS-Alarm still ringing in the armpit only to find that the Tortoise was being bestowed with the First Prize. !!

How could this happen Even Now? After every body dispersed, the shame shocked Rabbit asked, hey.,, how could ..U, the snail speed mover, do it even the second time ?

The Tortoise smiled and said, just check the Year on your GPS Alarm, its 2019 ! It took me the whole of the 2009 year only to find out how to change your Alarm settings !

After few days,The rabbit was too much determined to erase all the badputation across the generations.
He went to the Tortoise and proposed to have one last chance and re play the same hill climbing race.

Thinking a while deeply, the tortoise said, ok, but I am busy in raising my children.

We will re- run again in 2029. Rabbit agreed ! Ten years passed .

Race began. Rabbit left behind the tortoise.
Didnt relaxed for a moment reached the hill top only to horribly shocked to find that the Tortoise had just a while ago, finished the race !

Surrendering completely, he held the Feet of the Tortoise and requested to just let him know the Secrete !

In a thick and cold trembling voice the Tortoise revels " You started with my Son I had left behind in 2019 "!!!

- Just Created by me, Sandeep Godbole.